A controversy over the issue of children’s privacy has been stirred up commonly these days. Should parents invade their children’s privacy? In fact, many parents like pretending as a spy to check children’s mobile phone text messages, internet blogs or even online chat records secretly without asking for their consent. Therefore, conflicts easily arise since both of the two parties have completely dfferent points of view. As a result, the family relationship is ruined.
From the children’s point of view, they have the rights to their privacy so parents should not violate their rights behind their backs. During adolescence, teenagers have various changes mentally. They have the desires of autonomy and independence. On top of being the daughter or son, their social roles change and they become more mature. They have a wider variety in their social lives like an adult. They do not depend on their parents like babies but want to enlarge thier social circles and lead their own lives. Hence, they are dissatisfied when their parents interfere with their private lives. What’s more, this action damages the mutual trust. Children may think that their parents do not actually believe in them and therefore lose their sense of security. They think that they deserve respect in privacy so once the parents violate the code, arguments may then arise.
On the other hand, parents have another clear standpoint, which is to protect their own children. In reality, youngsters nowadays can easily fall into traps, for example, while hanging out with bad companies and meeting strangers with bad intention online. The high possibility of children getting hurt worries the parents. Therefore, they try every means to keep track on their children’s whereabouts. Besides, parents have the obligation to supervise their children properly. By checking children’s communication records, they think that they exercise this responsibility. Once they notice any communication with strangers, corresponding actions can be taken immediately, like asking the children to stay out of these people before tragedies occur. To parents, it is the most effective way to protect the children’s safety with no doubt.
With different arguments strongly held by the two parties, no one will be able to judge which side is right or wrong. Indeed, this method is doable, however not sensible. Truly, it is fundamental to balance the conflict by taking both parties’ interests into deep consideration.
One practical solution to relieve the conflict is setting up a mutual agreement. It is crucial for parents who fear their children could be befriending strangers to check up on their children. However, spying on children’s social networking sites or text messages, etc should not be done. Instead, parents can set some regulations with children through two-way communication. When children are going out, they are required to tell their parents who they are going with and their whereabouts, etc. Providing these details which is then the responsibility of children gives confidence to parents in children’s safety. At the same time, children should deserve to have their own privacy. Therefore, parents ought to abide by the code based on the agreement and not to invade their privacy. In this way, by giving a certain degree of freedom and independence with supervision will trust be built and strengthened.
Furthermore, parents can play an active role in understanding children’s social groups. Instead of checking their online chatting records, parents can ask them to introduce their friends. Parents can show more concern in knowing about their social lives, hence encouraging their children to open up and share with them more. Therefore, parents can have a clearer picture of the characters of their friends, for example, whether they behave badly or not. Children may even be willing to provide the telephone numbers of their friends as they have a sense that their parents do care about them. This even adds more confidence to parents in letting their children socialize independently.
In order to strike a balance between children’s privacy and parental supervision, each side must understand another’s view but not only consider their own interests. As a matter of fact, only by giving room for privacy with sensible parental supervision to children can a harmonious relationship be maintained.