“Helicopter parent” is a colloquial, early 21 st-century term for a parent who pays extremely close attention to his or her children’s experiences and problems, particularly at educational institutions. The phenomenon of helicopter parents has become more prevalent in Hong Kong and they are blamed for the existence of ‘Kong Kids’.
Write a letter to the editor of the Hong Kong Post about this issue. In your letter, you should elaborate on the seriousness of this problem and the adverse effects of this kind of parenting on children’s development. You should then suggest appropriate ways of parenting which benefit children’s growth nowadays.
Dear Editor,
I would like to draw readers’ attention to the phenomenon that “Helicopter parents” are becoming more commonplace in Hong Kong. A helicopter parent refers to one who is extremely attentive to his or her children. It is also said that the existence of “Kong Kids” should be attributed to helicopter parents. It is doubtless that such phenomenon causes vast consequences.
“Helicopter parents” focus on their children’s experience and problems both inside and outside their homes. Inside the home, children are expected to learn from their parents on how to be independent, so as to prepare the children to survive in the world. Yet, helicopter parents stands in children’s way of learning so. Helicopter parents are so afraid of the apples of their eyes being hurt that they try to perform every simple task for their children. If they are busy working, they will attempt at all costs to employ one or more maids to save the “princes” and “princesses”. Let us recall when we learnt to tie our shoelaces, and to bathe. Perhaps we are taught to do so at the age of six or so. However, thanks largely to helicopter parents, a large number of children are unable to fix their shoelaces or to bathe at their graduation of primary school. The helicopter parents are so “caring” and “responsible” that they eventually spoil the children.
Not only do helicopter parents supervise their children closely at home, they also pay full attention to their beloved ones outside their homes, particularly at educational institutions. Helicopters parents usually uphold a notion that their children should always be pampered at schools, as if the children are at home, loved and pacified by themselves. Therefore, helicopter parents, all of a sudden, become “supervisors” of the schools. They constantly phone their children’s teachers to check if other students at school are willing to accompany their children, and if their own children pay enough attention to schoolwork. Worse still, when their children complain about the unsatisfactory scores or unfair treatment of the teachers, helicopter parents will very often spare no pains to phone the school again, expressing their or more accurately, their children’s agitation.
Owing to the sudden upsurge of “helicopters” in Hong Kong, it is argued that “Kong Kids”, another colloquial term to describe the Hong Kong children who cannot be independent from adult care. This kind of parenting brings forth a number of adverse effects.
That children being unable to be independent is the frost and foremost problem in children’s development. Because of parents’ close attention to them, children are unable to complete easy tasks like tying their own shoelaces or bathing, not to mention some more intriguing ones like cooking simple dishes. It might be true that children will not face any difficulties as long as they are protected by their parents every minute. Yet children will grow up one day and leave the greenhouses. When they go camping or enjoy picnics with their friends, their incapability to take care of themselves will be exposed immediately. They will be teased by their peers, just because they have never been trained to perform them. Peter, a pseudonym, muttered that his self-esteem was thoroughly shattered after learning that he could not fix his bed, while others could. When he went camping with their friends, because his parent, most likely helicopter ones, never taught him to do so, when he was interviewed by a newspaper. It reveals that the inability to take care of themselves can have an undesirable psychological effect to the children.
On top of not being independent, the prevalence of helicopter parents also results in self-centredness of their children. Due much to the efforts of helicopter parents, who by all means satisfy their children’s wants of good grades and good inter-personal relationships at school, the “Kong Kids” often wrongly perceive that they are able to get what they long for at ease. They become self-centred and ask for more and more they want. They do not even respect their teachers and be friendly to their fellow schoolmates because their parents will help them deal with their teachers and school life anyway. A number of teachers, during the interview in a TV documentary about relevant topics, stated that they dared not to give certain students low grades because of their fear of being complained by their teachers. The teachers worry that this kind of parenting will hamper students’ future when they have to cope with their working parents and bosses. Indeed, children should be friendly and respectful to others, not be self-centered.
“Helicopter parenting” is certainly an inappropriate way to help children grow; instead, children should be taught to face difficulties themselves.
Parents should spare some more time talking to them, instead of serving them everything. At the early age, children should leave their parents to take care of themselves, like tidying their desks and drawers. Parents should also instill correct attitudes into children’s minds since childhood. Parents should tell their children to respect their teachers and peers, and to be responsible for their own school work. Parents should give more opportunities for children to share the burden of homework, so as to make them independent.
Also, parents should make their children face failures themselves. One must experience failure before he succeeds. Parents should not contact their children’s school as soon as their kids get poor results. Parents should work with their children on how to improve themselves. Only when children are able to learn to be independent when they are small can they be mature to face reality in future, and can they wipe out the nickname “Kong Kids” themselves.
Yours faithfully,
Chris Wong